I had this big reinforced realization this morning that though we have spent the past 2 months in some very real, very scary places, scenarios, eventualities, etc., WE HAVE NOT BEEN ALONE.
Early in this story we received some flowers and a note from a family in our Stake. It read simply, "Courage... on est avec vous"; in English this reads "Have courage... we are with you."
I was, at the time, touched that people we don't know all that well would take the time to do such a thing-- but it's words have driven straight to my heart several times in the past 9 weeks.
We have realized that we have not been alone. We have taken courage and strength from this. Time and time and time again...
Our Stake (Our regional church congregation for those unfamiliar with this terminology-which includes Paris, Versailles, and other cities surrounding Paris) had a 72 hour rolling fast February 23, 24, 25. We even heard about several people who fasted 48 hours, or more... people in our ward, our stake-our family away from home.
We have heard several stories about small children who have learned to pray and have FAITH and feel GOD's love for Parker, in behalf of him, for us and discover for themselves that God hears & answers prayers.
In sheer Earthly numbers -- we have not been alone-- Parker's sisters, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, church leaders, dear dear friends on this continent and others. People we know & people we don't know have prayed for us, thought for us, hoped for us, lit candles for us.
Abby's friends' moms & Hannah's friends' moms & Axelle's friends' moms have taken turns for the past several weeks welcoming the girls into their homes for lunches & shuttled them to & from school on some sunny but often many rainy days...if these women were not my friends before this, they certainly have become my friends since. Our hearts are knit as one-as one mother's hope & courage melts into another's...
A myriad of doctors in emergency, ICU, neurology, neuro-surgery, step-down continued care, our pediatrician Dr Robin, Dominique his nurse, the "MRI/Scan-Man" whom I often see outside his post on our many trips to Necker or our days from the inside longingly looking to break free from Necker's confining walls has walked down this path with us...and the secretaries for the various units have helped to bridge that path between hanging cliffs for us, more than once.
We've seen other families who have passed in & out of hospital care and whose stories have touched our lives & given us perspective, hope & more compassion. We have seen children with permanent, severe handicaps in Garches... Had doctors and nurses in Garches who wonder of our news each day. I once saw those children, and saw nothing but handicap, and felt sadness & heartache & wonder. Now I see around their handicaps, whatever they may be-- & see beauty & perfection & wonder.
10 Neuro surgeons
3 USC doctors
5 ICU doctors
30 nurses & aides from various teams who have intimately cared for us
30 school friends
50 church friends
The ear team
The pharamcists...and on & on.
Church members in Malaga who said they would continue to pray for us after John & I both poured out our souls at the pulpit in Spain.
NO. We have not been alone.
30-40-50 friends, work affiliates, here and there and seemingly everywhere seem to multiply by 2, then 5, then 10, or 20 or 50.
The gardienne of our building, her mother who speaks nothing but portuguese...we communicate to each other in passing by holding our hands together, making a shape of a cup...then pointing to the heavens with tears in our eyes. To her, I say, in loud french, thinking that somehow this will allow her to understand what it is I want to say, "MERCI POUR VOS PRIERES." We both smile, nod our heads & look up. "Thank you for your prayers" is all I need to say. She understands. We understand. He understands.
Pointing to the heavens, I have seen angels. I have seen concourses of angels in those very first few difficult days who hoped and rallied and sat and waited with us... I saw them holding my son, my baby. I felt peace in knowing that someone, some people, could hold him, and love him & sing to him when I could not. Many of these people I knew, and recognized, others I did not. Every single night we were asked to leave the hospital during Parker's hospitalizations, I thought of those heavenly beings & prayed that they would have ,mercy again on me & take my son to a safe, warm place, in cupped hands & keep him well until I was allowed to return. I felt the heavens reverb with solemn and fervent prayers from earth up to the heavens.
No. We have not been alone. EVERYWHERE I TURN I FEEL STRENGTH & LOVE & COURAGE EMANATING FROM OTHERS. We thank you & continue to thank you...and yes-we take courage in that. Great, great courage. We feel you with us, walking down this scary path, and climbing these mountains behind mountains. You carry us when we cannot carry ourselves & you give us resolve to be stronger & wiser & better. We take much courage in and through and because of..you.
